Rhymes with Tuesday: Christmas Liar



Christmas Liar


I don’t know what could be worse;

You pulling out that

Unexpected gift bag,

I have nothing for you in return.


I just don’t know what’s worse;

The startling sight of

Red and green wrapping,

Or my boss barging in to my stall.

(How embarrassing.)


I cannot decide what is worse;

Your sickeningly thoughtful

One-sided gifting,

Or my skirt tucked into my hose.


I’m trying to decide which is worse:

You with a purchase,

I with nothing,

Or forgetting to wear pants to work.

(I’m a jackass.)


You see, my office friend,

We made no firm commitment

So I left you off of my list.


I struggle and squirm,

I open my gift thinking

What in the hell I’ll say next.


“I left your gift at home.

It’s right on the counter.”

I’m a shiftless, Christmas gift-less liar.

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